End of the Year

My kids’ school year ends this week, though the only reason it didn’t end last week is because then they’d have to have nothing happening last week, which would encourage parents to wonder why they didn’t end it the week before that… and, well, that’s a vicious cycle that leads to no school at all. Slippery slopes and all. But still, I have to wonder why they’re holding school this week when the kids are doing nothing of consequence.

But I digress. This has been a landmark year in our family. It marks the first and last time we’ll have each of our three kids in a different school. My daughter entered high school this year, my older son continued in middle school, and my youngest was in his last year of elementary school. The great conjunction is at hand! Next year we’ll be back to two schools as the youngest enters middle school.

It’s been a good year for all three, complete with successes and challenges, but mostly successes. The youngest is chomping at the bit, ready to move up to middle school. Having two older siblings he’s always been a little “older” than other kids his age, so I think he’ll be more than ready for the added level of maturity of middle school. He’ll get to start exploring a little with electives, and I’m hoping he’ll start to develop some other interests. Right now he exists primarily for tennis, Pokémon, and reading. He’ll get to try an advanced math class next year, which we’re hoping he’ll enjoy.

The middle child has been taking his own course, and I’m proud of him. He’s a different type of kid than his sister, and he recognizes it. While she was into choir, writing, Chinese,  and art in middle school, he’s into band, tech classes, and Spanish, and was a strong member of the chess club. And that’s when we could get his mind away from Pokémon.

The oldest, our only daughter, had a lot of fun and a lot of stress this year in high school. She’s probably the most motivated of our kids. She was thinking about college and what she wants to do with her life before she even started getting bombarded with it this year from the guidance counselors. That’s got it’s pluses and minuses. She’s been motivated to take classes that will help her get accepted by colleges, but she’s also been taking classes that have threatened to overwhelm her.

But along the way she’s also been doing precisely what she should be, at least in my opinion: trying out things to decide what she most likes to do. This year it was band. I’m still not sure what inspired her to go that direction when she’d been in choir in middle school, but she took up the saxophone and quickly established herself among other students who had been playing longer than her. She fell in love with band, and for a while decided she wanted to be a music teacher and to go to Ohio State University. I was a little concerned about the potential high price tag, but wisely set that aside for the time being and tried to be supportive while encouraging her to keep her options open. She was only a freshman, after all. A lot can happen in three years.

And it did. Halfway through the year she burned out on band. And, as usually happens when she gets totally into something and then burns out, she went back to her art. She’s been self-teaching herself art for several years now, and she’s getting quite good. It’s been the one constant in a life of exploration. This time, perhaps, she reached the same conclusion her mother and I reached some time ago: she should be an artist, but with a practical side. She came to the same conclusion when she got the opportunity to tour the school district’s technical education center and learned about their graphic arts program. That became her new goal, and her college aspirations shifted considerably closer to home.

I have to keep reminding myself that she still has three more years and may very well change again–and that’s okay. This is the time for her to explore. Whatever she finally settles on she’ll do well at. And I’m hoping her younger siblings will see her example and follow it in their own way. I’m not worried about her–she isn’t happy without a plan. Her younger brothers, however, aren’t nearly so motivated. Yet. They just need to do some exploring of their own, I think. In that regard they are fortunate to have a trail-blazer sister. As it is, she decided she needs to take a language next year and, having selected French, has spent part of the past couple months studying it on her own. This girl has little use for teachers.

Each of my kids are so different from one another. Their interests sometimes overlap, but as often as not they’re off in very different directions. If there is anything I’ve learned from fifteen years as a parent it’s that you pretty much have to keep a different playbook for each kid. But then where would the fun be if we were parents to three clones?

It’s been a pretty good school year for our kids. But I have high hopes that next year will blow it away. But first, a well-earned summer break. My oldest especially needs some down-time and a chance to recharge. I just wish I could join them.