Trivialities

The other night my wife was telling me about how one of our cats gave her strange looks while she was doing yoga. I made some comment about it not being able to tell if she was doing “downward-facing dog or mutant-looking cat”. My wife laughed and pointed out that “downward-facing dog” really is a yoga position and wondered how I knew, considering I’ve never done any yoga. I told her it was probably something I picked up from a “Dharma & Greg” episode.

I’ve long been a font of useless information. I can remember the names of yoga positions I’ve never done (or even seen), but forget to take the muffins out of the oven even with two timers set. I could tell you who was the production designer for “The Empire Strikes Back”, but not the name of the guy in Data Warehousing I’m having a meeting with next week.

It occurred to me, however, that while I may remember weird stuff, it’s not necessarily useless information. I’m a writer, after all, and I keep hearing how writers are supposed to know a little bit about everything. If that’s the case, then…well, that’s me! I’m perpetually curious, and constantly cramming my head with seemingly pointless factoids. I am the very model of a modern major general.

Not that my recall is exactly flawless, mind you. I can still get beaten fairly handily in trivia games. Usually my storehouse of useless data refuses to cough up the right information when the pressure’s on. Rather it leaks out at odd times, or times when it’s not important and people will generally think I’m weird to remember something like that. In short, it’s not even useful to liven up a cocktail party or floundering conversation.

It’s Norman Reynolds, by the way. I know you’re dying to ask me that.

But yes, I suppose it does have its uses, and writing is one of them. Now I just need to figure out a few more practical applications…

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Not-so-little things mean a lot

One of the most difficult things about moving three years ago was leaving behind people who have become very important to us. Ten years is a fair amount of time, and the friends we made in Boise have come to be some of the longest-running friendships my wife and I have known. We vowed to keep in touch with these people. We’ve been largely successful, though it hasn’t been easy or as often as we’d like. Entropy affects relationships, too.

Yesterday, in an interesting coincidence, my wife and I both got packages from separate friends in Boise who had been thinking of us for various reasons. In both cases the things they sent showed that these dear friends really know us–perhaps better than we realized. And perhaps more importantly, it showed that they are thinking of us–and fondly.

That’s pretty cool, when you think about it. Someone was going through the regular course of their day and something cause them to think about us, to think, “Hey, I’ll bet my friend would appreciate this.”

And then they took it a step further. They didn’t just Facebook about it. “Hey Thom/Terhi, I saw something the other day that made me think of you!” Not that there’s anything wrong with that. It’s nice to know you’re thought of. But they actually took time and money to send us something! They held something in their hands, thought of us, and decided they wanted us to have those things, even though we’re five hours drive away.

Getting thoughts and ideas to one another in our virtualized world is not hard. Getting physical things to one another requires time and effort. It used to be less of a big deal, I suppose, because all communication required that time and effort. Today it perhaps means even more when someone takes the time to connect in a physical, tangible way.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is that my wife and I are blessed with really good friends who are willing to go the extra mile for us.

Thanks, you-who-know-who-you-are (I hope). These were wonderful gestures, and truly appreciated both for what they are and for what they represent. I hope we are as good friends to you as you are to us.

And because I feel the need to express feelings that mere pixels on monitor can’t adequately convey, I will turn to music–and an image that paints at least a thousand words. Thank you for your friendship, both of you.

http://youtu.be/rlr8JYn0QZ4

 

Posted in Gratitude | 6 Comments

Culture and video game music

If there’s still anyone out there unconvinced that video games get as serious musical treatment as movies these days, I present the theme from Civilization IV, “Baba Yetu”. Dang, I miss playing Civ-Rev.

And then there’s this song, “The Parting Glass”. I first heard this on a Loreena McKennit album, and it’s rare that someone covers a folk tune I haven’t heard before. But clearly someone has, and they decided to use it for a video game. Peter Hollens then proceeds to knock it out of the park:

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Movie Review: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

Over the weekend my wife and I watched “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty”, the recent Ben Stiller production. I don’t really see this one as a remake of the earlier Danny Kaye classic. Rather it seems as though they both start from the same James Thurber material and go very different directions.

In this modern take, Stiller’s Walter Mitty is a negative asset manager (if I recall correctly) for LIFE magazine, which has been purchased and is being transitioned into an online publication. Walter is living a life not of his choosing, but thrust upon him when his father died and he apparently stepped up to take care of the family. Somehow he found his way into a job at LIFE magazine, maintaining the photo negative archives. Unhappy with his life and with himself he often gets caught up in daydreaming about a life in which he is much more heroic than he feels. Even the girl at work he’s got his eye on he admires from a distance, trying to get connected through an online dating service.

His life changes the day the magazine is bought and the hatchet man comes to start the downsizing. Walter receives a roll of negatives from Sean O’Connell, the magazine’s larger-than-life, world-adventuring photographer who has taken a liking to Walter. Having heard that the magazine was in trouble, he’s sent a picture he feels captures the “quintessence” of life to go on the magazine’s last print edition cover. He also sends Walter a wallet as a token of friendship. Unfortunately for Walter, the negative of the all-important photo is missing. His quest to find it puts him direct contact with the object of his admiration and takes him on an international journey in pursuit of the illusive O’Connell, all while being pestered by a tech support guy from the online dating service, trying to help him solve issues with his profile.

This is an unusual movie. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It’s a small, personal movie set on a grand stage that leaves you both introspective and in awe simultaneously. The visuals are gorgous and sweeping, and the tone continually flirts with comedy, adventure, and drama. Yet Stiller the Director keeps it all low-key, including Stiller the Actor, though there are a few moments that make you think it might slip back into that. It’s an unpretentious movie that acknowledges its unlikely aspects while making you want to believe it anyway.

That’s not to say there aren’t problems with the movie. I just didn’t care about them until afterward when I was left having watched a movie that completely drew me in, and yet I couldn’t identify just why it had drawn me in so well. The message, if there truly is one, is so simple as to be overlooked entirely, especially since you’re not beaten over the head with it. Mostly I just wanted to be where Walter was, experiencing what Walter was experiencing.

This is not your typical Ben Stiller physical comedy–if I had to describe it, it would be a light drama. There are shades of the Stiller-esque lovable loser about Walter, but those quickly disappear–and yet his character arc is not a large one. He is not fundamentally transformed by his experience, but the change is there. Kristen Wiig plays his love interest with an endearing sweetness that makes it clear why Walter is so smitten. With the exception of the hatchet-man with the odd beard, pretty much everyone in this movie is likable in gentle, poignant ways.

I think, with all the awe and wonder associated with Walter’s journey I expected a strong message to come out of it, like I should know precisely what this movie expected me to do now that it had inserted itself into my psyche. It’s not that kind of a movie. The longer I think on it, I’m okay with that. Not every movie has to have a strong point. Some are just to be experienced and let you make up your own mind about what it said to you. Not everyone will like that. I did. I’d like to see this one again.

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Talent vs. Practice

While at “Life, The Universe, and Everything”, an annual sci-fi/fantasy writers symposium in a nearby city this past week I heard an interesting presentation from Howard Tayler, creator of the “Schlock Mercenary” webcomic. The premise he put forward (and backed up with various studies) was that in life practice and persistence will generally trump talent.

He introduced this idea with a study conducted with children in the New York City school system. All of the children in the study were given an age-appropriate IQ test. Then later they told half of the children, “You did well! You must be talented!” The other half they told, “You did well! You must have worked hard!” They then later offered the children a chance to take another IQ test, but gave them the option of taking a test similar to the one they had already taken, or one that would be more difficult. The “You must be talented” kids generally chose to take a similar test, while the “You must have worked hard” kids generally chose the harder test.

Later they gave the kids a third test, this time one that was several years ahead of their age group. The “Talented” kids did poorly, while the “Worked Hard” kids not only did significantly better, but many of them told the researchers that was their favorite test yet.

The idea, then, is that more important than talent is that you can succeed by working hard. The talented kids, evidently, only believe they are talented until they encounter contrary evidence, at which point they fold, suspecting those who dubbed them “talented” may have lied to them. Hard working kids, on the other hand, believe that they can figure things out if they just keep working hard.

I see some limitations to this idea, and I would be careful to take it too far, but I think there is also a certain validity to it. Or at least it seems to fit nicely with my own experience and self-image. Take my writing, for example. I discovered writing in seventh grade when my English teacher had us write a short story. She liked mine enough that she asked permission to enter it in the school writing contest. I agreed, and I won, being advanced to the district-wide contest where I won second place. That was cool!

Each year thereafter when the contest rolled around I would write another story to submit. For the next five years I went to the district competition and averaged second place every time. And when I graduated from high school and went to college I largely gave up creative writing. I took a class or two, but I knew that you had to be especially talented to make any money from writing, and while I was talented, evidence showed that there was always someone more talented than me, even though I was the only one who had consistently won every year. Besides, I did submit a story to a magazine once, and they didn’t like it. In short, when offered the chance to take another test like the previous one or to take a harder test, I stuck with what I knew I could win.

Fast forward over twenty years. I took up writing again after moving to a new city. I needed something to do with my free time, and that seemed as good as any, since I could never entirely stopped writing. I just stopped trying to do anything with it. But after successfully completing NaNoWriMo, I decided I wanted to continue writing.

About that time I discovered the Writing Excuses podcast, produced by writers for writers. The underlying message of these podcasts is that writing is work, but work you can manage if you are persistent and keep developing your skills.

This was music to my ears. In the intervening years I had learned that I could accomplish an awful lot in life with the willingness to work hard, even if it was something I wasn’t initially talented in. Given enough time I could figure things out. I could apply this same persistence to writing, and who knows? Perhaps someday I could be a professional writer, something I’d talked myself out of years before.

I’m not a professional writer yet. But I’ve been writing almost continually ever since, having completed two novels in three years. I’m making good progress on a third. Hard work? I can do that.

The more I think of it, I seem to be a case study for Mr. Tayler’s hypothesis. I was placed in the “Gifted and Talented” program as an elementary student. I was told I had a talent for music–as did everyone in my family. And yet practicing was never something I enjoyed. Neither the flute nor the oboe that I briefly tried came easy for me, and don’t play either now. Only singing was a talent I was able to ride far enough, though I annoyed my college voice teacher with my lack of dedication. I played in the Caribbean steel drum band for a couple years before it got too hard. Talent only took me so far. Practice was not something I was good at.

Something changed once I left college. It may be the sense of responsibility of providing for a family that kept me working at things even when they didn’t come easy, or it may be I just found things I enjoyed enough to practice. I don’t know. But somewhere I learned the value of showing up, of continuing to work at something until I understood it. And that has served me well.

But enough about me. I think there’s something to Mr. Tayler’s advice. We may be doing our children a disservice by emphasizing talent too much–or hard work too little. Yes, I took satisfaction knowing that while there were other kids who could write better stories than me, none of them ever beat me twice. None of them ever even placed twice.

But I think I got the wrong lesson from that. I still went about things the same way every year: Scramble to crank out a story a few weeks before the contest, have my mom proofread and type it up, and then submit it, sit back, collect my award, and then not worry about it again for another year. It never occurred to me that if I were to spend more time improving my writing I might I have placed first more than once. But at that point writing was something I did, something I was talented at, not something I had to work at. After all, if you have talent you don’t need to work at it, right?

I sometimes look back and wish I’d not stopped writing after high school, that I’d not convinced myself I couldn’t make a living at writing. I wish I’d spent more time at it when I was in college and had so much time! But considering the number of areas I was coasting by on talent at the time I doubt I would have done anything differently. I was laying the seeds of learning to work hard, but those were in the supporting areas, the things I did in order to pay for college. It would be another five to ten years more before I began to realize just how far hard work could take me.

Not that I’m trying to blow my own horn (much). I’m essentially a lazy guy. Working hard is great, and it’s done well for me, but I still don’t like doing it if I don’t have to. It’s just that being a big boy seems to require doing things I don’t want to. I think that was another thing that I had to learn along the way. I’m just glad I’ve kinda, maybe learned it just a little. Enough to get by, anyway.

Hand me the remote, will you?

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Maintaining proper distance

There have been a few people who at one time I admired, usually based on their professional work. That led me to insert myself into their orbit to some degree, be it following their blog or trying to connect with them at conventions. At that level of contact I became disappointed and disillusioned with those people, and they fell from my list of people to pay attention to.

Well, I just spent time with those people again. I think I overreacted. People will disappoint you on occasion, but that’s no reason to dump them completely. In one case that person gave a tremendous presentation that changed my perspective of how things work and inspired me to keep pressing forward to reach my goals. In another case, though I still feel this person is perhaps a bit hypocritical, he still had valuable insights on things when he removes his personal emotions from the equation and speaks pedagogically. And his contradictory beliefs in one area don’t necessarily invalidate his ideas in other areas.

No, I don’t plan to reinsert myself into these people’s orbits, but I also don’t plan to think so negatively of these people, either. They’re still valuable sources of ideas. They still have interesting and valuable things to say. I just need to not bestow virtue on them that they do not possess, nor probably ever claimed.

Admiration can be a dangerous thing. We should be careful not to build up someone higher than they can live up to–or know to live up to. In the end we’re all people, with all the good and bad that entails. And in the end, who’s the bigger jerk; the person who fails to live up to someone else’s expectations in a jerk-like way, or the person who imposed those expectations in the first place and reacted like a jerk when they weren’t lived up to?

Let’s call it a draw. Friends?

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Myth, culture, and perspectives

Hat tip to my brother Dan for calling this to my attention. He came at it from a business point of view, no doubt, as he’s been working heavily with India and Indian developers for years. I came at this from the point of view of a storyteller. The idea of mythology influencing culture clicked pretty heavily for me. I’ve known for some time that world-building should include mythos, but this really drove home why it matters and how one can use it. A very interesting presentation.

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Stay classy, Holdernesses!

UPDATE: The estate of the songwriter for “Rent” decided the song wasn’t enough of a parody to count and asked them to take it down, which they have.

I’ve somewhat recently discovered the Holderness Family and their series of videos on YouTube (you may remember the “In Our Christmas Jammies” video a few years ago?). I think their videos are great; catchy, funny, and not afraid to laugh at themselves. Well, evidently not everyone loves them. It wouldn’t be the Internet if they didn’t attract some negative comments, some of them rather nasty. So what do they do? They make a song out of them!

“You’re just too white”?!?! Uh….what exactly are they supposed to do about that? Performing in blackface is a no-no, and these are family-made videos, so are they supposed to run out and adopt some black kids just to please the haters? That wouldn’t please them–they’d just complain about how they probably just adopted black kids to look diverse.

No, I think the Holdernesses have the right approach here. Sometimes the best way to deal with haters is to let them speak for themselves and reveal just how stupid they sound.

Stay classy, Holdernesses, and keep ’em coming!

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Hard answers

Remember the old Aesop’s fable about the competition between the sun and the wind? They wanted to prove who was the stronger, so they made a bet on who could get a traveling man’s coat off. The wind went first, blowing as hard as he could, but he only succeeded in making the man wrap his coat all the more tightly around himself. Then the sun went next, gently shining down and warming the man until he was too warm for the coat, and removed it.

Now, I always thought the sun was just clever for having rigged the contest before it could even begin, but there is fundamental truth there nonetheless. And yet it’s a truth we all regularly overlook. For evidence you need not look any farther than the Internet. We are, by and large, the wind. Instead we need to be the sun.

People like to tell us frequently that “love is the answer.” And they’re correct. Love is like the sun–it’ll warm others into doing what you want much, much faster than blowing a hurricane of abuse at them.

The trouble is we don’t seem to know the question. People act as if it’s, “What should I give to those who think the same was as I do?” Loving those who love you isn’t the prescription for the world’s ills, it’s the cause of even greater tribalism and inter-group conflict. But it’s the easiest application of love, and so most people never make it any farther than that. I can’t say that I’m any different, frankly.

But what made Mahatma Gandhi a great person was not that he faced down the most powerful nation on earth, but that he did it without hating that enemy. What makes the Dalai Lama a wise and peaceful person is that he doesn’t carry hate for those who disagree with him.

One of the most difficult things to learn is to truly “love the sinner, hate the sin.” We encounter people every day who disagree with us, sometimes noisely, sometimes even violently. But we will never change their minds if we respond in kind. We only validate their opinions of us. The real lesson is to learn how to still see them as people worthy of love–and then to show that love.

If we allow ourselves to become frustrated, annoyed, angry, or hateful toward those we disagree with we choose to carry a burden around that will not just poison our relationship with that person, but with everyone we have contact with. If we can at least learn not to pick up that baggage, but instead let it lay where it is, we can spare ourselves a lot of misery. Even better if we can somehow learn to ignore it and show that person love.

I understand that what I’m suggesting runs counter to human nature. Believe me, I know how difficult it is to love someone who is calling you names and rubbing your nose in every fault they see in you. But I’ve never once seen anyone change another person’s mind by responding in kind. I don’t think it can work. I have seen people slowly-but-surely change a person’s mind through love and patience. I’ve even seen acts of love change people almost instantaneously.

Love is the answer. I agree with that. It’s also the most difficult of answers to apply. But perhaps more importantly, we should be asking the right question. It’s not just, “How should I treat those who are on my side,” but “How should I treat everyone, even those I don’t want to even like?”.

We’re all looking for an easy answer. There isn’t one. Love is the answer, and it’s the hardest answer of all. It just happens to also be the only truly correct one.

Posted in Random Musings | 4 Comments

Water buffalo ballet

I admit I’m a bit of an aerospace geek. I grew up in a small city where there weren’t a lot of commercial air flights, so whenever I heard an airplane fly over I had to look. This didn’t change when I moved to a bigger city and bought a house not far off the flight line of the local airport. Now I live nowhere near an airport, but I work next to it, so I still look up whenever I hear airplanes.

So, needless to say, this video is the epitomy of cool:

It’s also an interesting lesson in planning. They could have just showed you the cool parts, but they chose to show you the pilots and film crew working out how they were going to pull off their aerial acrobatics with huge, slow airliners safely. These were prototypes, evidently, and represent about $1.5 billion dollars worth of potential debris.

It just goes to show that to play at the top levels of most any field it’s all about discipline. It’s about having the experience to know how to not take risks.

For more information on what they were doing, read here.

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